...KIDZ SAY THE DARNEST THINGZ...

>3-year-old Reese: " Our father, who does art in Heaven, Harold is his name. >Amen."
> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------
> >I had been teaching my 3-year-old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord's Prayer for >several evenings at bedtime, she would repeat after me the lines from the >prayer. Finally she decided to go solo. I listened with pride as she
>carefully enunciated each word, right up to the end of the prayer: "Lead us
>not into temptation," she prayed, "But deliver us from some E-Mail. Amen."
> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------
> >....and one particular 4-year-old prayed, "And forgive us our trash baskets
>as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."
> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------
> >A Sunday teacher asked her children, as they were on the way to Church >service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in Church?" One bright little
>girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."
> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------
> >A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin 5, and Ryan 3. The boys >began to argue over who would get the 1st pancake. The mother saw the >opportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, he would say ,
>Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait." Kevin turned to his
>younger brother and said, "Ryan you be Jesus."
> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------
> >A father was at the beach with his children when his 4-year-old son ran up
>to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to shore, where a seagull lay dead in
>the sand. "Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked. "He died and went to >heaven" the dad replied. The boy thought for a moment and then said, "Did >God throw him back?"
> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked.
With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear."
> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Six-year old Angie and her four-year old brother Joel were sitting together in church. Joel giggled, sang and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had enough. Angie whispered, "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church!" "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked.
Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men standing by the door? They're hushers."
> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her 5- and 6-year olds. After explaining the commandment to honor thy father and thy mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (who was the oldest of his family) answered, "Thou shall not kill!"
> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Three boys were talking about their fathers' excellence. One of them said: my father is a great professor. When he is talking about a subject, only 10 people in the world can understand him! The second boy said: my father is a great brain surgeon, when he is talking about his surgery, only 5 people in the whole world can realize what he is saying. The third boy said: my father is a pastor, when he is preaching nobody can understand what he is saying.
> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------
A father was reading Bible stories to his young son. He read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt."
His son asked, "What happened to the flea?"
> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------






wahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa.........

A nice Christmas story... God and the Geese

There was once a man who didn't believe in God, and he didn't hesitate to let others know how he felt about religion and religious holidays. His wife, however, did believe, and she raised their children to also have faith in God and Jesus, despite his disparaging comments. One snowy Eve, his wife was taking their children to service in the farm community in which they lived. They were to talk about Jesus' birth. She asked him to come, but he refused. "That story is nonsense!" he said. "Why would God lower Himself to come to Earth as a man? That's ridiculous!"

So she and the children left, and he stayed home. A while later, the winds grew stronger and the snow turned into a blizzard. As the man looked out the window, all he saw was a blinding snowstorm. He sat down to relax before the fire for the evening. Then he heard a loud thump. Something had! hit the window. He looked out, but couldn't see more than a few feet. When the snow let up a little, he ventured outside to see what could have been beating on his window. In the field near his house he saw a flock of wild geese. Apparently they had been flying south for the winter when they got caught in the snowstorm and couldn't go on. They were lost and stranded on his farm, with no food or shelter. They just flapped their wings and flew around the field in low circles, blindly and aimlessly. A couple of them had flown into his window, it seemed.

The man felt sorry for the geese and wanted to help them. The barn would be a great place for them to stay, he thought. It's warm and safe; surely they could spend the night and wait out the storm. So he walked over to the barn and opened the doors wide, then watched and waited, hoping they would notice the open barn and go inside. But the geese just fluttered around aimlessly and didn't seem to notice the barn or realize what it could mean for them. The man tried to get their attention, but that just seemed to scare them, and they moved further away. He went into the house and came with some bread, broke it up, and made a bread crumb trail leading to the barn. They still didn't catch on. Now he was getting frustrated. He got behind them and tried to shoo them toward the barn, but they only got more scared and scattered in every direction except toward the barn. Nothing he did could get them to go into the barn where they would be warm and safe.

"Why don't they follow me?" he exclaimed. "Can't they see this is the only place where they can survive the storm?" He thought for a moment and realized that they just wouldn't follow a human. "If only I were a goose, then I could save them," he said out loud. Then he had an idea. He went into barn, got one of his own geese, and carried it in his arms as he circled around behind the flock of wild geese. He then released it. His goose flew through the flock and straight into the barn -- and one-by-one, the other geese followed it to safety. He stood silently for a moment as the words he had spoken a few minutes earlier replayed in his mind: "If only I were a goose, then I could save them!"

Then he thought about what he had said to his wife earlier. "Why would God want to be like us? That's ridiculous!" Suddenly it all made sense. That is what God had done. We were like the geese--blind, lost, perishing. God had His Son become like us so He could show us the way and save us. As the winds and blinding snow died down, his soul became quiet and pondered this wonderful thought. Suddenly he understood why Christ had come. Years of doubt and disbelief vanished with the passing storm.

He fell to his knees in the snow, and prayed his first prayer: "Thank You, God, for coming in human form to get me out of the storm!"


(p.s - emailed by Mervyn) ( ^^,)

Find the Greatest Christmas Gift of All in the Gospel

Christmas turns your attention to gifts like no other season. You rush to choose and buy them to give to those you love; you savor the thrill of receiving them from family and friends. And in the midst of all that activity, you try to stop long enough to remind yourself of why you're celebrating with gifts in the first place: It's Jesus' birthday, the time to remember when God visited our planet in the flesh.

Here's how you can find the greatest gift of all - God Himself - in the Gospel:

Understand that nothing is truly good unless it leads to God.
Realize that God is the source of all goodness, and all the good gifts He gives must help you connect to Him if they are to bring true goodness to your life. Remember that only God makes the good news good.

Take the focus off yourself and place it on God.
Honestly examine what makes you feel happy. Is it the affirmation of God lavishing gifts on you? Is it a sense of satisfaction that comes from knowing you're worth God's attention? Know that your good feelings should be rooted in God's worth, not your own. Recognize that true joy can only come in the way that God designed it - from knowing and celebrating Him. Understand that the point of the Gospel isn't just to give you a variety of powerful gifts. It's to help you see and savor God's glory. He is the true treasure.

Communicate what salvation really means.
Think about whether or not you'd be truly fulfilled in heaven if God weren't there with you. Realize that no amount of pleasurable experiences can make up for the lack of His presence. Whenever you present the Gospel message to others, don't focus on its power to help them avoid the pain of hell or to get into a heaven full of privileges. Instead, emphasize what's most important about salvation. Let people know that salvation enables them to live with their Creator and enjoy His presence forever. Don't say, "Salvation is great!" Say, "God is great!" because His saving love is the gift of Himself. He is the Gospel. Understand that the Gospel is not a way to get people to heaven; it's a way to get people to God. Know that if you don't desire God above all other things, than you haven't yet truly believed or obeyed the Gospel.

Let the Gospel help you see God's image.
Rejoice that, although you don't have any video recordings of Jesus from when He walked the earth as God incarnate, you can see Him when you let the Gospel message and the Holy Spirit's affirmation of that message draw you closer to Him. As you learn more about Jesus in the Gospel, pray to see His face more clearly and understand the image of His glory more fully.

Ask the Holy Spirit to awaken you.
Understand that the Holy Spirit authenticates the Gospel as God's own word. Ask the Spirit to awaken your soul to see God's manifest presence in the Gospel. Rely on the Spirit's power to help you confirm that the Gospel is both reasonable and spiritual. Remember that God's glory is what the Gospel events and promises are meant to show.

Realize that seeing God's glory is the key to becoming more holy yourself.
Understand that you are transformed more into Jesus' image by means of focusing your attention on His glory. As you admire Jesus' purity and holiness, your sinful habits will begin to feel foreign and distasteful. His worldview will gradually shape your values, thinking, and decisions. His wisdom, power, and promises will give you greater confidence to choose faith over fear. His glory will inspire you to delight in His fellowship and yearn to see Him face-to-face in heaven. His love will empower you to love others more.

Join God in His joy.
As you see how glad God is to have His Son, Jesus, rejoice with Him that He thought of the perfect plan to extend His love to all people through Jesus. Don't be somber when pondering the Gospel. Realize that it's a message of great joy.

Let your love for God lead you to repentance.
Know that you can't appreciate how the Gospel makes forgiveness possible for you if you don't first feel genuine remorse for your sins. Recognize that the only way to truly experience that remorse is to ponder how glorious God is, and to let your love for Him motivate you to repent because you want to please Him.

Appreciate how God's gift of pain leads you to Himself.
Understand that when you're willing to suffer for the sake of the Gospel message, you're choosing the beauty of God's truth over the ugliness of Satan's lies, and you'll be able to see God's beauty more clearly. Remember that you can trust God to meet every genuine need you have, no matter what your circumstances, but true needs are only those that are necessary for you to do God's will and bring glory to Him. Know that the Gospel's aim is not an easy life. Rather, it is deeper knowledge of, and trust in, God.

Don't let miracles distract you from the One who performs them.
Remind yourself that the material world God has created, the spiritual power He gives believers, and the signs and wonders He sometimes unleashes in answer to prayer are meant only to draw you closer to God. Make sure you're not focusing on God's miracles at the expense of God Himself.

Consider why you truly want to grow to be more like Jesus.
Ask yourself: "Do I want to be strong like Christ, so I will be admired as strong, or so that I can defeat every adversary that would entice me to settle for any pleasure less than admiring the strongest person in the universe, Christ?", "Do I want to be wise like Christ, so I will be admired as wise and intelligent, or so that I can discern and admire the One who is most truly wise?", "Do I want to be holy like Christ, so that I can be admired as holy, or so that I can be free from all unholy inhibitions that keep me from seeing and savoring the holiness of Christ?", and "Do I want to be loving like Christ, so I will be admired as a loving person, or so that I will enjoy extending to others, even in sufferings, the all-satisfying love of Christ?" Make sure that your goal to become like Jesus is rooted in a passion to see and savor Him in the Gospel message.